Right now I am sitting in front of my computer screen in my mundane and thankless office, staring into space pretending to do work, but really doing nothing. I am actually thinking about downloading Tetris on to my computer to fill up the day.
I came in the side entrance so my boss wouldn't notice that I am late. By late I mean actually on time, but since everyone I work with arrives to work a 1/2 hour early I am late.
There is an abnoxiously fat, red-headed woman in the office next to me with a big, schrill, piercing voice. She also smells.
One of my four bosses actually is wearing a pink shirt with a white collar. Are you serious with this move? He bears a striking physical resemblence to a mix of Data from Start Trek and, you guessed it, Bill Lumberg.
My Job: I deal with the goddam customers so that the engineers don't have to. I fill out parts requisition forms (prf's). I am good with people. Last week I filled out a form incorrectly and 5 people came into my office to tell me about it.
At 11 AM today I have a meeting with the Bill's.
One of the Bill's just asked me if I could work on Saturday because they are really backed up with inventory.
They took my pencil sharpener away from me.
There is is a sign in my office that reads "Commitment....I will care about what I do and I will do my best for the company."
I had an idea for a diet sports drink six years ago....my classmates laughed at me and told me that was the worst idea they had ever heard.
I bet the guy that came up with G2 and Propel Fitness water is going to make a million dollars.
My copier/printer says that the ink is low. I just put in a new cartridge yesterday and it won't print.
I have dark skin and a weird last name and I don't understand why people can't pronounce it correctly...its really not that hard.... Like Michael "Jordan" plus the "off" switch.
Every day is the worst day of my life.
I am probably getting downsized. They are attempting to just fix the glitch in the system.
Tomorrow I am allowed to wear jeans. I bet I could even get away with a Hawaiian shirt.
If I had a million dollars, I would do two chicks at the same time.
The people I work with legitimately like country music and, you guessed it, Michael Bolton. A bunch of no talent ass clowns.
I could use some shrimp jammers and extreme fajitas.
This post is 100% true. It may sound familiar. I think they should make a movie out of it. Oh wait, I think they did. Unbelievable this is my life.
Love,
Lumberg Fucked Her
I came in the side entrance so my boss wouldn't notice that I am late. By late I mean actually on time, but since everyone I work with arrives to work a 1/2 hour early I am late.
There is an abnoxiously fat, red-headed woman in the office next to me with a big, schrill, piercing voice. She also smells.
One of my four bosses actually is wearing a pink shirt with a white collar. Are you serious with this move? He bears a striking physical resemblence to a mix of Data from Start Trek and, you guessed it, Bill Lumberg.
My Job: I deal with the goddam customers so that the engineers don't have to. I fill out parts requisition forms (prf's). I am good with people. Last week I filled out a form incorrectly and 5 people came into my office to tell me about it.
At 11 AM today I have a meeting with the Bill's.
One of the Bill's just asked me if I could work on Saturday because they are really backed up with inventory.
They took my pencil sharpener away from me.
There is is a sign in my office that reads "Commitment....I will care about what I do and I will do my best for the company."
I had an idea for a diet sports drink six years ago....my classmates laughed at me and told me that was the worst idea they had ever heard.
I bet the guy that came up with G2 and Propel Fitness water is going to make a million dollars.
My copier/printer says that the ink is low. I just put in a new cartridge yesterday and it won't print.
I have dark skin and a weird last name and I don't understand why people can't pronounce it correctly...its really not that hard.... Like Michael "Jordan" plus the "off" switch.
Every day is the worst day of my life.
I am probably getting downsized. They are attempting to just fix the glitch in the system.
Tomorrow I am allowed to wear jeans. I bet I could even get away with a Hawaiian shirt.
If I had a million dollars, I would do two chicks at the same time.
The people I work with legitimately like country music and, you guessed it, Michael Bolton. A bunch of no talent ass clowns.
I could use some shrimp jammers and extreme fajitas.
This post is 100% true. It may sound familiar. I think they should make a movie out of it. Oh wait, I think they did. Unbelievable this is my life.
Love,
Lumberg Fucked Her
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